There's a rumor going 'round Toyland
It's about Noddy the dirty little man
They say he done a dirty by lifting up his shirty
With Big Ears and the rest of his gang
There was only [unverified] stuck up Noddy's arsehole
And for a penny a piece you know they liked his crease
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Big Ears was in front
But he couldn't get his c*nt
Well, his ears were big as [unverified]
But his penis never grew
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
The next in line to f**
Was little Porky Pig
But Noddy made the piggy noises
After what he did
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Rupert Bear was there
With his ma** of pubic hair
And Rupert Bear, he didn't care
He came in Noddy's hair
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well [unverified]
'Cause he said it was obscene
So he greased up his truncheon
And stuck it up his arsehole, arsehole, arsehole
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
After everyone was done
And they'd had a lot of fun
Noddy's hat was red but
His dad was s**ing his thumb
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, the moral of this song
To you dirty little boys
Charge 10p or more
Be a high-cla** who*e
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Noddy
You know what my mother told me
You sold your arsehole
At the Elephant and Castle
Noddy, you dirty little ba*tard
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Well, Noddy you should know
You can never get a blow in Toyland
Noddy, you dirty little ba*tard