My mouth is wet, my throat is dry
I'm going blind in my right eye
My tonsils are as big as rocks
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more - that's seventeen
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut, my eyes are blue
It might be the instamatic flu
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke
I'm sure that my left leg is broke
My hip hurts when I move my chin
My belly bu*ton's caving in
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained
My 'pendix pains each time it rains
My toes are cold, my toes are numb
I have a sliver in my thumb
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak
I hardly whisper when I speak
My tongue is filling up my mouth
I think my hair is falling out
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight
My temperature is one-o-eight
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear
There's a hole inside my ear
I have a hangnail, and my heart is ...
What? What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is .............. Saturday?
Good bye, I'm going out to play!”