We interrupt this program
At the very moment Gordon Ramsey has Ricky Gervais
In a choke slam
To bring you this important message for the whole fam-ily
Those with weak stomachs are encouraged to hold hands
Recent reports have indicated
That accused terrorist agent Dizraeli
Still hopes he may be vindicated
The public need not be alarmed however
He isn't dangerous
His prison cell is quite well insulated
Now
When asked how he would like to plead
Guilty or not guilty
Dizraeli demanded the right to read
The entire three-hundred page indictment
It seems he's determined to delay the court proceedings spitefully
As a compromise the court has granted the rights
Of an exclusive interview to a news reporter tonight
And to satisfy international rights observers
Against conflicts of interest
The right researchers have selected a fine journalist
With an impartial reputation
To conduct this harrowing and harsh investigation
In some circles of London, England
Baba Brinkman is known as a cunning linguist
Of some distinction
We'll update you the moment he's received the thug's confession
And we now return to Gordon holding Ricky in the "crunch position"