Came home early one night from work
Thought my wife's in bed with a jerk
She's in there with a big piece of plastic
Yelling and a-screaming
Super-deluxe creaming
She don't want my love stick
Cause she's vibrator dependent
Don't want me in it
Says I don't make the right noise
Been replaced by batteries
Hey there, fellas, can't you see
She just wants to play with her toys
She don't want to go out and dance
She don't want to get in my pants
Just stay home and vibrate
I'm getting big blisters on my hands
Thinking maybe I ain't a man
Man, she ain't gonna get impregnate
Cause she's vibrator dependent
Don't want me in it
Says I don't make the right noise
Been replaced by batteries
Hey there, fellas, can't you see
She just wants to play with her toys
Play with them, honey
There she was in the bedroom, sounding like she was shaving her tallywhacker with a
battery-powered device. Me, I'm prancing around out in the living room, got the demon jism
buildup. I mean, I got a severe case of it. Lot of pressure on my brain, eyeballs turning white, grabbing my tallywhacker all the time. I look her in the eye, and I say, uh, I say, "Baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby please! Baby, you got something I need, something I want. I want to put my face in the special place." She says, "What?" "I want to put my face in the special place, yeah. I want to get ring-around-the-face honey, you know what I'm talking about, when the full moon comes around." She said "Mojee wojee, you got to do something for me if you want to do that." I said, "What's that honey?" She said, "Mojee, know what you got to do? You know I got these battery-powered things here, and you know I got some things that plug into the wall, put 110 volts on my tallywhacker. Mojo, I want you to go out to the store, I want you to get me something, something big and ugly, gigantic vibrator, Vibratorzilla it'd be. And unplug the refrigerator, Mojo, get Vibratorzilla, bring it in here and put 220 on the money, honey!" I said "Baby, you done got crazy." "And then Mojo, you can put your face in the special place...
But you're gonna have to
Gonna have to
Make a little noise"
Took her down to see a nurse
Cure her of this terrible curse
Doctor said, "Lady, you're afflicted
Man, you got a terrible habit
Now I told you not to grab it
I pronounce you addicted"
Cause she's vibrator dependent
Don't want me in it
Says I don't make the right noise
Been replaced by batteries
Hey there, fellas, can't you see
She just wants to play with her toys
Yeah, she's vibrator dependent
Don't want me in it
Says I don't make the right noise
Been replaced by batteries
Hey there, fellas, can't you see
She just wants to play with her toys
She just wants to play with her toys
She's got VD
That's Vibrator Dependency now, isn't it
No, honey, you can't plug my toes into the wall
Nah, I ain't gonna hum no more either