[Verse 1]
You know they call me Vagisil because I sooth vaginas
f** 'em so hard they can hear it in China
I'll f** any single mammal that you put in front of me
As long as it has tits -- and a c*nt
Spaghetti on the table is spaghetti on the floor
Everybody get ready to do the dinosaur
I drive automatic transmission and I'm pimping 'round the block
The ladies understand about the size of my clock
The machine with hands that tell me the time
From twelve to twelve to twelve I just rhyme
I love dick. Wait no, that was a lie
I want the P-U-S-S-Y
I went to the store and I bought some shoes
They were f**ing sh** so I k**ed the manager
I made him dead
He gave me head
[Verse 2]
Yo, my penis is a muscle and it makes me hustle
I woke up this morning next to a guy named Russell
Shave your balls and f** a pirate
Look at my dick, b**h: admire it
My favourite day was 9/11
k** a baby, make it go to heaven
f**ing snow, that sh**'s alright
Baby p**y sure is tight
Grandma p**y: dry and wide
I molest children, with pride
Break into a zoo, kidnap a bear
Where's the cli*oris? I don't know where
f** the west and f** the east
Get molested by a priest
Central Station masturbation
Making love to animation
n***a lips: I think they're weird
f** an Asian and grow a beard
On your head
Grow a beard
Go to bed, b**h!
[Verse 3]
Relax your mind, unhunch your shoulders
k** your family with a boulder
Rape is healthy, d**h is healthy
Steal from people to get wealthy
Making love and taking love
k** your family from above
k**ing children and f**ing children
Making love to all the children
Family road trips, stabbing knives
Drive into traffic and end their lives
Impale yourself: Asphyxiation
Beat your son for masturbation
Get a job and go to college
k** your kids at Grandpa's cottage
k** your sister, k** your mother
("Help me, Mister") - k** your brother
You don't know apathetic like a Buddhist ascetic
Nabokov's Lolita is so f**ing poetic
Tape roller blades to some guy
Throw him off a bridge and watch him fly
I can't hear you cause you're f**ing dead
It's not a sandwich if it don't have bread
(What the f** does that mean?)
[Verse 4]
I make profit, I'm gonna' f** a prophet
I'm gonna' f** a prophet just to make profit
f**ing hate Jews but I'll f** Moses
Hope he like an*l, I'mma send him roses
I'll part the red sea of your c*nt
If you're unpure you'll be shunned
Getting crucified is a walk in the park
I got laid on Noah's Ark
I'm Persian, b**h. The Jews I'm purgin'
I got paid silver to rape a virgin
I k**ed Muhammad with my bare hands
Cut off his dick, left it in the sand
Gotta' get paid, I gotta' make a profit
So I said to Mary, "let's make a prophet"
"It's gonna' please us
So let's make Jesus"
[Verse 5]
I rape my way into social cla**es
I get paid to touch girls' a**es
Buy a house alarm to keep out the Negro
I put s**m in plants, watch them grow
Look and my wiener, it's in your face
I'm gonna' put it in your p**y or the other place
If the night is black expect a n***a attack
k** people with a Hacky Sack
If your bu*t was a tire it would have nice rims
Kidnap someone on a whim
What is this diagram trying to show us?
b**h, my name is Joe Enormous
That lady is ugly, she has a mole
Stick your dick into a wormhole
Dark matter is the result of n******gs
Your tits are so small even Pluto is bigger
And Pluto isn't even a planet
There's no sound is space, b**h, so f**ing can it
I ain't your buddy and I ain't your pal
Open the pod bay doors please, HAL
So I can f** a spaceship shaped like a dong
Einstein is a Jew, he got it all wrong!