Dolly:
I have always been a woman who arranges things
For the pleasure--and the profit--it derives
I have always been a woman who arranges things
Like furniture and daffodils and lives
If you want your sister courted, brother wed, or cheese imported:
Just leave everything to me
If you want your roof inspected, eyebrows tweezed, or bills collected:
Just leave everything to me
If you want your daughter dated, or some marriage consummated
For a rather modest fee
If you want a husband spotted, boyfriend traced, or chicken potted:
I'll arrange for making all arrangements
Just leave everything to me
If you want your ego bolstered, muscles toned, or chair upholstered:
Just leave everything to me
Charming social introductions, expert mandolin instructions:
Just leave everything to me
If you want your culture rounded, French improved, or torso pounded:
With a ten year guarantee
If you want a birth recorded, collies bred, or kittens ported:
I'll proceed to plan the whole procedure
Just leave everything to me
(Mr. Sullivan: Where to, Dolly?
Dolly: Yonkers, New York, to handle a highly personal matter for
Mr. Horace Vandergelder, the well-known, unmarried, half-a-millionaire
Mr. Sullivan: Gonna marry him yourself, Dolly?
Dolly: Why, Mr. Sullivan, whatever put such a preposterous idea into my head--your head!)
If you want a law abolished, jury swayed, or toenails polished:
Just leave everything to me
If you want your liver tested, gla**es made, cash invested:
Just leave everything to me
If you want your children coddled, corsets pulled, or furs remodeled
Or some nice, fresh frica**ee
If you want your bustle shifted, wedding planned, or bosom lifted--
Don't be ashamed girls
Life is full of secrets, and I keep 'em!
I'll discretely use my own discretion
I'll arrange for making all arrangements
I'll proceed to plan the whole procedure
Just leave everything to me!