The state of Utah pays me to educate and inspire the youth...
...so I impart to them the gift of knowledge, which,
Oddly enough, often escapes my judicious lips
In the form of a singsongy one-liner—
Practical advice for the young Americans:
“When the doctor asks for a stool sample...
“...Dairy Queen it!”
In addition to the song, I mimic the act of gathering a stool sample—
So they know what to expect when they see the workers at Dairy Queen—
The overpriced chocolate soft serve twisting and twirling into the paper cups