[Verse 1]
When I die - aw f*ck it I ain't really wanna die
I'ma try to stay alive eating fries at Five Guys
With nine wives and 28 kids - I'm a family man yo
"Cuz money ain't sh**!"
Hold up wait I ain't mean to say that
Somebody call my accountant tell him I need my plane back
It's the same cat who's been begging for a belly rub
Run on Ellen's show yellin' “Hey lemme smell your thumb -
- And a**" yeah I got a nasty rash
From digging in the trash last week with Pastor Matt - it's true
Yo plus I got a lot to do
Sold my soul to Google AdSense my brain to YouTube
I'm the new dude not as big as Lebowski
But I'm crashing on your couch watching Curb with Klaus
We didn't mean to get that misdemeanor screaming at seniors
Just my penis is a bit of an eager over achiever
Fiending for a slice at Serafina with my wife
Tell the gossip girls I got the world - I'll stop it when I like
I'm nice - so polite I gotta ask you
Do you mind if I take a taste of that cat food
Cash rules but nobody's around me
Jumping in the pool drunk cuz I feel like drowning
[Chorus]
Yeah, yo yo yo yo yo yeah
And if you don't know, you won't know
I ain' telling you sh*t so get the hell away bro
Yeah, yo yo yo yo yo yeah
I ain' telling you sh*t so get the hell away bro
Br-br-br-bro br-br-bro
I ain't telling you sh*t so get the - get the - get the hell away bro
[Verse 2]
I'm at Coachella with the broke fellas
Telling jokes to the doped up coke sellers
I'm buying - I'd be lying if I said I wasn't
Only guy to sky dive out of an oven - it's nice
Living life just two days at a time
The best rapper to never do it I'm too lazy to rhyme
Fugazi? Well they say fake it til you make it
So I started watching Taken getting wasted in my basement
Felt like Jason Statham with some naked chicks saving
Woke up in a haze with jizz on my Playstation
Peter Parker i'm awkward as Jim's dad
Still getting lucky when my girls on the rag I'm sad
Well at least like most of the time
The other half I'm at peace with my nose on a line
I'm blowing it (Nah you good) - holding the plane hostage
Making out with goth chicks middle of a mosh pit
Obnoxious I just wanna be a kid again
So I'm at home eating Skittles and some Ritalin
Indifferent could give a sh*t if you feel me
I do raps for me and my little friend Billy!
[Chorus]