[performed by Footprints in the Custard]
Let me regale a tale of woe with such a bitter end
Involving a gig and lots of booze it's hard to comprehend
I found myself deep in my cups pissed out of my head
And with a bladder full to bursting I crawled into my bed
Horns of ale and pints of beer I'm filled to the brim
An alcoholic tug of war that I don't think I can win
Ureaka! I've done it!
The amber nectar flows
I got so drunk in the middle of Preston
I pissed all on my clothes
Ureaka! I've done it!
Made sense at the time
To cast off my blue denim jeans
And soak them in urine!
Bleary eyed, pounding skull I woke to dire straits
Discovering what I'd done last night when I opened the flood gates
A pool of shame and wee-wee upon my sisters floor
I knelt down and sobbed in the waste that I had poured
Koppabergs and Jager shots a veritable co*ktail
I didn't know my night would end with such an epic fail
NOOOOOO!!!
My jeans?! What have I done?
I'm going to have to wash them...
No...