The kids at school used to beat me up
Every day it was more bad luck
Couldn't get a date to the prom
Then I heard about some footwear that would make me strong
Kung Fu Sandals made of straw
Indoor outdoor can't go wrong
Fighting masters wear them all the time
Now I'm a Kung Fu legend in my prime
Now I walk the streets in my fighting gear
I'm the kind of guy even ninjas fear
I chop and kick everyone in sight
With my sandals on I'm always up for a fight
The president calls maybe once a week
And I go beat up some no good creep
Don't step on my sandals whatever you do
Or you're gonna give me the kung fu blues
Kung Fu Sandals made of straw
Indoor outdoor can't go wrong
Kung fu masters wear them all the time
Now I'm a Kung Fu legend in my prime