I talk to the waitress
Yeah she was pretty hot
She gave me her number
But that's all I got
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
Started a conversation
About the United Nations
Had to use imagination
She was talking about reincarnation
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
Stayed up all night drinking
When I should've been home
Had a vision of the blessed virgin
bu*t now I'm not sure at all
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
Miguel Urbiztondo
Backstage New Year's Eve
When the policeman came to look for him
He said "What the f** do you know?"
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
She from the Inland Empire
Her dad was an umpire
Her mama was a go-go dancer
Everybody got in for free
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
I know that our last record
Didn't do very well
But now we're back on the block
With our freedom rock?
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
The Montreal policeman
Wouldn't get off his a**
So all your sh** was stolen
What's the matter with that?
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
I got a yellow carnation
I got some Kevlar pants
I got a new American Century
Do the freedom-hater's dance
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
I was driving in my car
It was filled up with yams
For no obvious reason
That's just who I am
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
Everybody gets one, everybody gets one for free
Everybody gets one, everybody 'cept for me
Last call
Find the one
Everybody gets one
Everybody gets one 'cept for me
Everybody gets one 'cept for me
'cept for me