The Toxic Avenger came into my life
Back in 1993 when I was barely even nine
I ran straight home form school each day
To catch the Toxic Crusaders on my tee-vay
Every day they went on another adventure
Cleaned the world make it a bit better
But 5 eps in something went wrong
The show got canceled never came back on
Well I fast forward by about 6 years
A growing boy with punk rock in his ears
Staying up all night watching channel 4
With Troma's Edge TV and more
I watched every episode, every single movie
And loved Trent Haaga, wish I could be that groovy
I'ld move into Tromaville and never be gloomy
Bring Debbie Rochon with me as a roomie
Terror Ferma, Mothers Day
Surf Nazi's and then Squeeze Play
Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell
Fertilize the Blaspheming Bombshell
Sergeant Kabukiman NYPD
The Toxic Avenger parts 1 2 and 3
And Citizen Toxie I didn't forget
But I almost did Tromeo and Juliet
I learnt my morals through my VCR
And these films I've watched have pushed me too far
Woke up one morning and realized
My brain and soul have been TROMATIZED
A few more lines just to make my point
About how Troma has affected my thoughts
These films have turned my gray matter runny
Now unless it involves d**h I will not find it funny
Desensitized in every way
Sex d** violence even holidays
But I stillwatch my old tapes each night
Praying I can make Lloyd Kauffman my wife
I love the things that that man has done
Bringing indie cinema to everyone
Through films and books and DVD boxsets
Insulting the world without regret
But through it all they just keep on growing
34 years and they still keep going
I always wondered how they were so successful
But I know by now they are going to HELL
I learnt my morals through my VCR
And these films they've made have pushed me too far
Woke up one day and I realized
My brain and soul have been TROMATIZED