If I had a cigarette for every time a perfect stranger asked me for a cigarette
Then I'd have enough cigarettes to get me through the day
And if I had some spare change, every time a perfect stranger asked me for some spare change
Then I'd have enough spare change to take care of these bills I need to pay
And dude, I know that times are tough
But that does not mean that you can have my stuff
So how about a ride?
I could drive you to the shelter
We could eat dinner at the Andre House
And you could even take a shower
'Cause I think you deserve much more than a smoke and fifty cents
You deserve to be self-sufficient and buy your own cigarettes
Oh when the saints, oh when the saints
Oh when the saints go marching in
They will feed you so much pizza
That you'll forget about the rut that you are in
Oh when the saints, oh when the saints
Oh when the saints come marching in
Well I'm sure they'll feel so much better
With the illusion that they're helping out those sinners
When all they really do is buy the so-called sinners sh**ty dinners
Like five dollar hot and ready pizzas and high fructose corn syrup punch
You're diabetic and apathetic, wondering when they'll bring you lunch
To the park they keep you in, oh, when the saints go marching in
So I wish I had a cigarette for every time a perfect stranger asked me for a cigarette
But I wonder what a cigarette will really do to help that person out
I wish to God I had some spare change every time a perfect stranger asked me for some spare change
But there's not enough spare change in the world to make such and empty gesture count