Quite often I get a thinking
How as kids we got by
Like christmas time in our house
We couldn't even afford a fire
But we made do in our house
Back then when I was young
Dad used to s** a peppermint
And we'd all sit round his tongue
We couldn't afford no tinsel
On our christmas tree
So we'd just wheel old grandad in
And make the old c*nt sneeze...atchoo
Wheel him round the other side granny...atchoo
Well things change so bloody fast
I got children now of me own
Now I heard 'em unwrap their presents
Last night when I got home
Santa claus you c*nt
Where's my f**ing bike
I've unwrapped all this other junk
There's nothing what i like
I've wrote you a letter
And i've come to see you twice
You geriatric wa*ker
Where's my f**ing bike
If i wanted a pair of f**ing shoes
I would've f**ing asked
This cowboy suit and ping-pong set
You can stick right up your arse
You went and mucked my order up
It's enough to make you spew
It's not just me that's pissed off
My sister's cheesed off too
Santa claUs you c*nt
Where's my f**ing pram
You promised me you f**ing c*nt
You know who I am
'Cos I'm the little girl
You made sit right on your hand
Never mind your ho ho ho
Where's my f**ing pram
Next time i go to see him
I'm gonna punch him in the guts
Set his f**ing reindeer loose
Kick rudolf in the nuts
Just you wait til next year
'Til we get to that store
A mate of my little sister
'll come stomping through that door
Hey mums and dads just check his breath
And watch his bloodshot eyes
Don't listen to him boys and girls
'Cos he tells f**ing lies
He's a pisstake and a pervert
He's not even f**ing bright
'Cos that f**ing wa*ker
Forgot my f**ing bike
Hey santa claus you c*nt
Where's my f**ing bike
I've unwrapped all this other junk
There's nothing what I like
I wrote you a f**ing letter
And I came to see you twice
You geriatric wa*ker
Forgot my f**ing bike
Yeah I'm gonna tell my dad on you
f**ing punch your head in....c*nt
I saw mummy s**ing santa