[Words and Music by Ted Kirkpatrick]
Unavoidable laryngectomy
Summon the E.N.T. M.D.
Is this the end for me?
Install the Western Electric number 5000
Creach modification
Nicotine addiction, larnyx benediction
Learn a whole new way to speak
Physic's law number two
Every action that you do
Has a strong and binding force
Set in motion human course
Your rainbow and the pot of gold
The dreams that you had grow cold
Your mistake burdens you a hundred fold
God knows our hearts are weak
But we must learn to think before we speak
And consider the damage that we wreak
By choosing a foolish road to seek