[Verse 1]
Oh sh**, the antidepressant is wearing off
And now I'm paranoid, I feel the people staring off
Into the distance, the future I seem to always fear
If I can't face it tell me why the f** I'm even here
Dissertations on how I'm seeking emancipation
Cause I'll discover inner peace through the isolation
My purpose may be clear, possibly I was mistaken
I need the peace, somebody say as-salāmu alaykum
I doubt the people in my life really want me around
I'm so supportive, and I always seem to turn a frown
But when I'm feeling down they think I'm looking for attention
I say the same when I am speaking to my own reflection
On top of that I'm young so I can't be opinionated
I put in thought but they just say I'm undereducated
But really I'm just over-medicated
It's no surprise, everything has been premeditated
[Bridge]
Drowning in the floods of tears
I'm a dark boy, I only got a few good years
The universe has my fate set up so linear
So I should do what I want to do while I'm still here
Like find a pretty b**h and grab her my both of her ears
Tell her that she really have nothing left to fear
And we can blow up like that motherf**ing blimp Goodyear
Pour out buckets overhead from all the floods of tears
[Verse 2]
But truthfully I really just need something to do
Cause I just think about the worst when I be up in my room
I hate to socialize but I can pull it off so it's cool
Maybe I'll join a gang and then I pull it off and it's bool
I hate to say that every night I think of taking my life
I wanna die, doesn't even have to be suicide
I then I'll quiet down, both my opticals will be dry
I couldn't make another motherf**ing flood if I tried
I remember the moment I figured out I was crazy
Has some murderous intents like I could shoot up a baby
Has some murderous intents like I could pull up to my exes house
Take her pets out and snap the necks until there's no sound
Hate everyone at school it's just fake hoes and snake n***as
Not a pacifist, I'm a masochist, beat me till my bones break n***a
Guess I only get with crazy girls but I think crazy girls are great n***a
I can stomach it because my stomach been filled to the brim with liquor
Oh sh**, f** n***a
You can see I'm not playing with you
Fed up with feeling sad all the time
Dealing with all this anger too
Got schizophrenic tendencies
But I really don't mean to danger you
Blow my head off like Kurt did in the year
1996 minus 2
I can fake it pretty damn well
Illustrate a genuine smile too
Tell this girl to get me coffee like the big n***a from the Green Mile too
People think I'm just a clown
Because I wear 13 inch size shoes
They never notice that I got the motherf**ing blues
[Interlude: Caleb Carnell]
Hey bro, we're starting to get worried
We haven't seen you in like two weeks bro
Where have you been?
What are you doing?
Just call us when you get this I guess
[Verse 3]
It's kind of crazy when you think about it
Cause every n***a boast around, but I f**ing doubt it
Built a natural sense of danger for all my surroundings
But when I pick up the pen and pad I'm f**ing astounding
We all real, Jesse Williams is talking truthful
They love to judge and hate because a n***a living youthful
But I put my thought in lyrics and I made them useful
And I learned I shouldn't care about f**ing approval
I want to change the world and watch my money quadruple
My music so abrasive, abusive, so exclusive
If you in my lane expect a quick, painless removal
I'll never sell out, big checks will get a refusal
This is my revival
I'm destined to be the best and all the signs are vital
I'm 'bout to light me up a blue like I'm launching Tidal
And figure out why my ex feel so f**ing entitled
Hold up, because I realize I'm k**ing it
I'm rocking back and forth like I'm in a ba**inet
n***as checking for the flows but I'm cashing in
n***as checking for the hoes, I'm a rapping plant
I'd really love to see a f** n***a sample that
Cause that's deada** the bottom line, it's f**ing flat
A n***a feeling unstoppable like I'm Rascal Flatts
It's like I'm f**ing a pistol when I'm co*king the strap
Shoutout to my girlfriend
Know that I'ma love you till the motherf**ing world ends
Telling me to chill when I'm 'bout to go off the deep end
And you a motherf**ing dime girl, perfect ten
Every flood of tears evaporates eventually
But I get a rain of hate every time they mention me
I don't need negativity all in my sight
The dark thoughts only happen at midnight