[Verse 1]
Sometimes I wonder what this sh** really means to me
Cause the road of uncertainty's all I seem to see
Cloudy thoughts every night same thing when I wake up
Wishing I could be a kid again where these grown problems never faced us
Poppa just turned 60 time flying so swiftly
Which reminds me this rap game don't mean a damn thing if he
Don't get to see me successful it's stressful just to think about
Everything that he gave for us whole ship would've sank without my poppa
And all I've got to offer
Is the dream of being an entertainer when I could've went and been a doctor
Or a lawyer or whatever the f** I could've been with a college degree
Thought of him giving up everything getting set in vain keeps following me
When truthfully by now he should be proud of us
Cause me and my brother and sister never had a struggle that was ever clouding us
From a rare black house hold with poppa home
I'm thankful cause the blueprint that was set I got to clone
For the man in me and how to raise me a family
Fear struck when that stroke hit cause taking him would've damn sure took my sanity
But he pulled through with his life and more so all his health in sight
I feel I have to take this time to make things right
[Hook]
I'm just trying to keep my focus, lord (x2)
[Verse 2]
My uncle talking bout suicide no one knowing what they posed to do
What happens when you get to running out of helping hands from people that's close to you
Stress will get to overdosing you when every option that you chose to do
Crumbled with and now your money grip is not enough in digits that can hold you through
All your bills that's stacked up and now your rent gets backed up
Landlord lacks f**s to give so now that place you shacked up
Turns vacant that's the type of sh** he been facing
Misplaced in a nation so far we can't even offer consolation
My momma keep telling me not to make his same mistakes
My own two feet to stand on she preached bout since my birth date
My worst fate in this lifetime is to wind up needing a life line on a constant basis
So I set my goals in constellations
Trying to reach them I refuse to ever be screeching to halt quick
Trying to do all this sh** right cause I feel it's me every ounce of fault hits
Blame none for your own life for the most part it's yours to shape
Yours to make the most of and coordinate
Take time when you orchestrate all your plans to prosper
Cause to get back time that you might just lose ain't never been one of life's offers
Everything you have it might cost you
But a big risk usually comes with a big gain and so I hope this path I chose was proper
[Hook]
[Verse 3]
25 summer seasons I done been through
Better bet your a** I'm blessed I'm breathing
Even if you don't believe in that issue that's seizing
My kind from these streets in a flash and leaving families grieving
I was raised to live like I'm an endangered species with good reason
Little Brandon pa**ed and still ain't no clue bout who let those shots bang
So ain't no way I think we'll ever know just why he got slain
Damn shame how this plot rings so much still can we not change
Shocked pained and distraught was his whole block as those tear drops rained
Shot down like a rabid dog in the road he was slaughtered
So a mom done lost her child and a child done lost her father
Now who the f** gon raise his daughter she don't deserve to be
Left without the man who gave her life in this cold world that we
Have a hard enough time raising these kids in god bless
The men who take life by ten two for they kids with no contest
Fatherhood is no calm quest a couple my n***as are on that
I pray yall keep the strength to get through how some of yall baby mom's act
I dodged that bullet years ago from a crazy baby mama
But a child deserves your best even if that lady bringing drama
To all my unborn children my life has no success to see
If yall don't feel yall got the best of me, I just gotta keep my focus