[Verse 1]
Nocturnal mind, nocturnal soul
Plus I got a locker for my strength to hold
Who allowed me to take control?
Try to go paycheck to bankrolls
Got the raincheck from tainted foes
Who got a long neck and stand on their toes
To get a good check on my broken nose
Like it's funny to see how it goes
I lost all my will to go on and always stay strong for a minute
Always the same sh**, isn't it? Never been in it, got my head in the linen
Always wanted to be winning, but now I see, it was never meant to be
If I don't have people who care, even lost all my friends and family
Got too much ambition for a guy my rank
Too big an ego to ever make bank
Too much sadness in my hand to think
Too much darkness in my heart to blink
Too much lead on my tongue to ever kick another verse again
Lay my mind on the ground, so you can use it as a doormat then
I never wanna go back, but then I went and got back to the start of the runtrack
Running all these circles in my life like a turtle, slow and pointless
Every word dropping from my tongue turns back into mental poison
Ich wünscht' ich könnte wieder denken wie normale Leute
Hab mich zurückgezogen, Musik wär wichtiger
Hab alles andre vergessen, das war nicht richtig, ja
But it's enough, I'm burning up, I'm gonna go
Cause noone told me that the demons in my mind could bleed into my soul
[Verse 2]
So I really couldn't end it all, so I didn't
As I sat crying in the bathroom
I spent hours puking over the rim
Woke up again in the afternoon
Stood up shakily, walked hastily
I needed to talk with my family
I needed to make amends desperately
Try to shake the demons that were breaking me
Didn't wanna go where the plants don't grow, where the sun won't shine, and I just don't know
If I ever could make it out of the woods, leave my bullsh** behind, and see whats good for me
I was burnt by ambition and fell straight to ashes
But I will rise again, cause the Phoenix is ma**ive