It was a normal day, I was having a wa*k
My knob was quite cheesy and it smelt pretty rank
It was just like any ordinary day
Then just as I'm about to shoot my load
A sombre voice came on the radio
And told me Princess Di had pa**ed away
Well, suddenly my stiffy went away
CHORUS:
Oh, Princess Di, why did you have to die?
Why d'ya die? Why d'ya die?!!
Just when I had a tingle in my Jap's eye?
My Jap's eye, my Jap's eye, my Jap's eye?!!
Oh, Princess Di, I'll wa*k and I will cry
wa*k and cry, wa*k and cry, wa*k and cry!!!
Now when I get a erection in my private parts
I start to think about the Queen of Hearts
And that's when blood drains out my knob
I've got to forget about the fatal crash
And think about Diana's hairy gash
And suddenly I feel it start to throb
So I sob and I have a hand job