Will somebody answer the f**ing phone? Good Lord.
Hello?
Hey Justin.
My name isn't Justin.
Hey. It's Aaron.
That's great.
I can't come out tonight.
What?
I'm going to see this girl.
But I thought we were gonna have an orgy.
No. No. Her name is Candy.
I don't care what her name is.
She's real cute. I gotta go. See ya.
What? Oh, hell no.
I know a girl who's tough but sweet.
(More like sour.)
She's so fine she can't be beat.
(I'll f**ing beat her.)
She's got everything that I Desire.
(Yeah, well she's missing a few inches.)
Set the summer sun on fire.
(I'll light her on fire.)
I want Candy. (Ew.)
I want Candy. (I didn't know you liked the taco.)
I want Candy. (Are you sure it's not Randy?)
I want Candy. (I'll k** that b**h.)
Go to see her when the sun goes down.
(You always told me you were going to the bathroom.)
Ain't no finer girl in town.
('Cause she's a s*ut.)
You're my girl, what the doctor ordered.
(I didn't know you could have a skunk as a prescription.)
So sweet she makes my mouth water.
('Cause my co*k was in your mouth last night.)
I want Candy. (Yeah, candy penis.)
I want Candy. (You're gonna smell like fish.)
I want Candy. (b**h, you're not Willy Wonka.)
I want Candy. (She's just a loose-pussied ho.)
Hey. (What?)
Hey. (What?!)
Hey. (Why do you keep saying hey?)
Hey. (Stop it.)
Hey. (What is this hey?)
Hey. (Stop it.)
Hey. (I will k** you. Shut up.)
Hey.
Candy on the beach, there's nothing better.
(Oh, gag me with a spoon.)
But I like Candy when it's wrapped in a sweater.
(Well, isn't that Kinky?)
Someday soon I'll make you mine.
(You're a co*keye, I don't want you.)
Then I'll have Candy all the time.
(You'll have the smell of fish all the time.)
I want Candy. (It's not even Halloween.)
I want Candy. (She's not even a real girl.)
I want Candy. (Great. Let's go to WalMart and get some.)
I want Candy. (Oh, God, we get the point.)
Candy in the morning time. (Ew.)
Candy in the hot sunshine. (Ew.)
Candy, baby, can't you see? (No.)
All I want is your Candy! (Gross.)
Candy in the morning time. (Ew.)
Candy in the hot sunshine. (Ew.)
Candy, baby, can't you see? (No.)
All I want is your Candy!
Hey. (Oh, not again.)
Hey. (Shut up.)
Hey.
All I want is your Candy!
Hey. (Shut up.)
Hey. (I will k** you. I will k** you...)
Hey. (...with my eyeliner.)
Hey. All I want is your Candy!
(I'll k** that b**h, too.)