'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
I was screwing the children and f**ing a mouse
The doo-doo was hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that Satan soon would be there
The children were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of Mama Luigi danced in their heads
[breathing]
What to my wandering eye should appear
But a miniature penis and two tiny balls
With a little old driver with a stubby old dick
I knew in a moment in my a** it would stick
More rapid than eagles, he came on my face
Dun dun dun
It was as white as the snow
[breathing]
He was jerking off on my back
And it looked like he had a furry ball sack
His bu*tcheeks were like roses, his a**hole like a cherry
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work
And fingered my winking brown eye with a jerk
The head of my co*k he held tight in his teeth
And the semen circled his head like a wreath
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name
"Now Deepercut, now Krobo, now CaptainOhYeah, and WalrusGuy"
So up to the housetop the coursers they flew
With a sleigh full of poo
But I heard them exclaim ere he drove out of sight
"Squadalah, we're off!"