Bachelor number three, maybe you're right for me?
Better than number two?
Contestant, my source of pride is I'm point-oh-nine microns wide
And built RAM tough, with racing trim
I'm one-tenth micron more than him
Bachelor number three
Rape me, a sight to see
Make me your bride-to-be
Well, I'm the first in history
To be the follower of me!
See, my strengths count while his are void.
In time I'll have his kind destroyed!
Five million cameras testify to truths your stubborn heads defy
Your blips leave little resonance
Your actions have no consequence
Your opinions have no weight
Beyond the air your pierced tongue spits them on!
Soon you'll join us, with your father, in a chorus of "Why Bother?"
That number three will only love his shadow
So loud and brash he'll sure be double-plus good
Kids, turn him up, yeah
Violences a**ert you, or something like that
Honey, pa** the tastebuds
Daddy says it's time to see
Who could be the match for me
And in my dream home, number three is plugging in my screen
The picture's so pristine, like our happy family
Yeah, yeah
That number three's the promise of the new breed
He'll caulk her hairlines, make us wanna breed rich
Kids, can't you listen? Stop biting each other
Stop screaming, honey, can't we change the channel?
Daddy says it's time to see who could be the match for me
And in my dream home Mister Three
Is on ev'ry magazine
With his teeth and hair so clean
We're one happy fat machine,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Bachelor number three
Bachelor number three
Bachelor number three
Bachelor number three
Bachelor number three
Bachelor number three
Bachelor number three