You know..
Dogs aren't clever
They eat their own dung
They whine like babies
And sweat through their tongue
The big ones are stupid
The small are high strung
But cats are c*nts
You know..
Dogs are filthy
They get ticks and fleas
They drag their a**es
And give Lyme disease
You have to train them
Pick up their crap
On your knees
But cats are c*nts
1, 2, 3..
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
It's easy to learn
So let's all say that
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
So spread the word
Through your own habitat
You know..
Dogs get rabies
They drool and they fart
They drink from toilets
They're not very smart
They get worms
But they're better than their counterpart
Cause cats are...
(Conan O'Brien) 'Scuse me
(Triumph) Hello, what's the problem here? Conan O'Brien, what do you want? This is my show! Mine! My show. What are you doing here?
(Conan) What the hell are you doing?
(Triumph) Singing a ditty?
(Conan) I have put up with your crap for years. But tonight you have crossed some kind of line. This is wrong!
(Triumph) Ooh, this IS wrong. What would Letterman say?
(Conan) This is clearly a crowd that expects more from you, Triumph. You have an audience of intelligent people here. Triumph, you could appeal to these people's higher nature
(Triumph) All right, what are you going to do about it?
(Conan) I was listening backstage. I like the melody. And I wrote some lyrics that I think speaks to the intelligence and humanity of this crowd tonight
(Triumph) Good luck
(Conan singing)
You know people should live together in peace
We wouldn't have famine, war or disease
Brothers and sisters should do as they please
But cats are c*nts
(Triumph) Conan O'Brien, ladies and gentlemen!
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
It's easy to learn
So let's all say that
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
Cats are c*nts
c*nts are cats
So spread the word
Through your own habitat
Why do you think they call it p**y?