Conan O'Brien - Cats Are Cunts lyrics

You know.. Dogs aren't clever They eat their own dung They whine like babies And sweat through their tongue The big ones are stupid The small are high strung But cats are c*nts You know.. Dogs are filthy They get ticks and fleas They drag their a**es And give Lyme disease You have to train them Pick up their crap On your knees But cats are c*nts 1, 2, 3.. Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats It's easy to learn So let's all say that Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats So spread the word Through your own habitat You know.. Dogs get rabies They drool and they fart They drink from toilets They're not very smart They get worms But they're better than their counterpart Cause cats are... (Conan O'Brien) 'Scuse me (Triumph) Hello, what's the problem here? Conan O'Brien, what do you want? This is my show! Mine! My show. What are you doing here? (Conan) What the hell are you doing? (Triumph) Singing a ditty? (Conan) I have put up with your crap for years. But tonight you have crossed some kind of line. This is wrong! (Triumph) Ooh, this IS wrong. What would Letterman say? (Conan) This is clearly a crowd that expects more from you, Triumph. You have an audience of intelligent people here. Triumph, you could appeal to these people's higher nature (Triumph) All right, what are you going to do about it? (Conan) I was listening backstage. I like the melody. And I wrote some lyrics that I think speaks to the intelligence and humanity of this crowd tonight (Triumph) Good luck (Conan singing) You know people should live together in peace We wouldn't have famine, war or disease Brothers and sisters should do as they please But cats are c*nts (Triumph) Conan O'Brien, ladies and gentlemen! Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats It's easy to learn So let's all say that Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats Cats are c*nts c*nts are cats So spread the word Through your own habitat Why do you think they call it p**y?