[Round 1: Carter Deems]
I'm nice dude, I'm like Dwight Schrute rocking the middle part
Your facial hair is lazy there you're missing the middle parts
I'm sending darts at his brittle heart 'til it rips apart
I'm so fly but I won't lie I just released a little fart
See I get really nervous so my stomach stays ga**y
And when I leave the battle there's a stain in my khakis
I be quick to admit that's really quite nasty
But warm milk's the only thing that'll relax me
I go to your mom's house and have a progressive conversation
It's witty and intellectual but only in moderation
He loves guns and claims the Glocks are blazing
I'll expose his heart without touching metal; Operation
I take the Road Less Traveled, you know Frost
Ice cold in the 90's I wore Hugo Boss
No fear I'll spit in his ear like when Uno lost
Cause I'm so much of a beast I made out with a two toed sloth
Yeah I'm a bad boy I've been through detention
Spit with a Force that would catch Mace Windu's attention
My bars are far sharper than Ginsu precision
I'm in a cla** by myself like in school suspension
I'm raw dude I'm like the Ja Rule of law school
You got them cans, my hands will turn them into dog food
I have a dog too his collar is all blue
If you have plans for later, I hope they fall through
Tiiiime
[Round 2: Carter Deems]
Carter's the king of diamonds, my bizarre style is argyle
Deep in the streets the only people that can be me are Guile
Not talking cars my bizarre bars are wild
Piranhas, upper cut from serrated blade will make his heart smile
Katana, but I hate when I rely on these violent rhymes
I hate rappers who think guns will be my demise
I had a gun shaking in my face and that's when I relied
On being calm in the situation, and I survived
True story
It's my job just to stomp your 9 to 5
Putting in work, bu*ton up shirt, I'm putting in work every time that I arrive
He stays crossed until we see eye to eye
I'm a boss, and I can't even tie a tie
Quick with the Quidditch, time to play keep away
Skipping over the Mean Girls I'd rather date Tina Fey
Either way I'll beast today and never let the nina spray
Putting macaroni in my pockets, I don't even need the tray
Capiche? I'm love and peace, time to put the piece away
On beats? I lead the way like a Green Beret
My poop was quite green today
You need to pray cause I'll turn up the heat and have him against the ropes, like Stevie Ray
Or Booker T, he's pushing me, you should really read a book or three
My pet iguana broke into his house and took your weed
You say you pushing keys like you're Pusha-T
But you're so much of a little B you'll probably try to cook for me
Time
[Round 3: Carter Deems]
You say you're gripping gats like you've been Iraq
But he's been attacked, floating in the ocean gunning with the fins attached
I finish cats instantly like infants sipping Similac
Your mustache is right wing your goatee is a democrat
They get in disagreements about voting for Gingrich
Your mustache is dumb your goatee is a genius
Your mustache went to University Of Phoenix
Online, your chin graduated on time with a degree in English
I should be in school instead I'm at No Coast rapping
He's a tool, let shots ring off like Frodo Baggins
Holes in his story send the ozone crashing
I drive a Prius, my other car is a komodo dragon
If Keak The Sneak watched Freaks & Geeks
The freestyles he complete would be the speech that we repeat
See defeat, breathe the heat like Cream Of Wheat
Intellectual rhymes, I'm well read like Pete & Pete
Freak-A-Leak is his favorite rap song
Freak-A-Leak his favorite instrumental to rap on
I got the heart of a thug, I should be at URL
Your mom looks like Cadalack Ron, she has a new car smell
You say you're a true mobster and you shoot cartels
I aim for his license plate, I shoot car's tails
I aim for his license plate, I shoot car's tails
I aim for his- that was a stupid line and so is your wordplay
I'm getting back to my roots, I celebrate Earth Day
Rhyme spontaneous, 12 block radius
So dope I use my birth name as my alias
I'm friends with Jews, Sheikhs and atheists
So I don't care about your gun's Big Bang I was raised a Creationist