[Chorus:]
Call on Dolly!
If your neighbour needs a new romance
Just name that kind of man your sister wants
And she'll snatch them up
Don't forget to bring your maiden aunts and
She'll match 'em up.
Call on
[Dolly:]
Missus Dolly!
[Chorus:]
She's the one the spinsters recomend
She even find a lovely bride
Call on Dolly!
[Fade out]
[Dolly:]
I have always been a woman who arranges things,
for the pleasure--and the profit--it derives.
I have always been a woman who arranges things,
like furniture and daffodils and lives.
If you want your sister courted, brother wed, or cheese imported:
Just leave everything to me.
If you want your roof inspected, eyebrows tweezed, or bills collected:
Just leave everything to me.
If you want your daughter dated, or some marriage consummated,
for a rather modest fee.
If you want a husband spotted, boyfriend traced, or chicken potted:
I'll arrange for making all arrangements
Just leave everything to me.
If you want your ego bolstered, muscles toned, or chair upholstered:
Just leave everything to me.
Charming social introductions, expert mandolin instructions:
Just leave everything to me.
If you want your culture rounded, French improved, or torso pounded:
With a ten year guarantee.
If you want a birth recorded, collies bred, or kittens ported:
I'll proceed to plan the whole procedure
Just leave everything to me.
([Mr. Sullivan:] Where to, Dolly?
[Dolly:] Yonkers, New York, to handle a highly personal matter for
Mr. Horace Vandergelder, the well-known, unmarried, half-a-millionaire.
[Mr. Sullivan:] Gonna marry him yourself, Dolly?
[Dolly:] Why, Mr. Sullivan, whatever put such a preposterous idea into my head--your head!)
If you want a law abolished, jury swayed, or toenails polished:
Just leave everything to me.
If you want your liver tested, gla**es made, cash invested:
Just leave everything to me.
If you want your children coddled, corsets pulled, or furs remodeled,
or some nice, fresh frica**ee.
If you want your bustle shifted, wedding planned, or bosom lifted--
Don't be ashamed girls,
Life is full of secrets, and I keep 'em!
I'll discretely use my own discretion
I'll arrange for making all arrangements
I'll proceed to plan the whole procedure
Just leave everything to me!