I was just a boy Back in school Teacher teachin' me the Golden Rule Listen to me, boy, now understand Your whole future lies in your hand (And she was right) Went to church on a Sunday morn Preacher preachin' his words of scorn God bless the child that's got his own Thought I had nothing 'til I found this bone Gonna go blind, gonna go blind 'Cause I do it all the time Gonna go blind, gonna go blind 'Cause I do it all the time Oh, my daddy, mister fix-it man Always had his tool in his hand Said you want it done right Want it done well Grab your tool, boy, and do it yourself Ain't no use in me pretendin' I can't leave myself alone Self-abuse is never-ending Since I found my magic bone Asked my mama, go out to play Said it's cold out, boy, listen what I say Play with yourself, boy, that's the best way Play with yourself, you can do it all day