William Shatner - I Can't Get Behind That lyrics

Let's go. Ready? From the top... My favourite shows on TV have twelve minutes of advertising. I can't get behind that kind of time! Eat quickly. Drive faster. Make more money now! I can't get behind that. My kids say: he said to me, and I'm like... and he's like... and she's like... It's all... He's all... She's all... I can't get behind that kind of like English! That'll be six to eight weeks before delivery. The rising oceans, the warming temperatures! The dying polar bears--no, tigers--in fifty years! Rising poison in the air and water! I can't understand why the price of gas suddenly rises when oil goes up...but takes months to go down long after oil falls! I can't get behind any of that! I can't get behind the gods who are more vengeful, angry, and dangerous if you don't believe in them! Why can't all these gods just get along? I mean, they're omnipotent and omnipresent, what's the problem? What's the problem? What about the men who say, 'Do as I do, believe in what I say, for your own good, or I'll k** you!' I can't get behind that! I can't get behind that! Everybody knows everything about all of us! That's too much knowledge! BOTH: I can't get behind that! Yeah! And what about student drivers using my streets to learn? If you learn to play the drums you got to go to a studio! Go to a parking lot for God's sake! Why are you jeopardising my life? I can't get behind a student driver! I can't get behind a driver who drives like a student driver! If you're going to drive an urban a**ault vehicle then get off the phone and keep your eyes on the road! Lifetime guarantee? Whose lifetime? Not mine! I haven't that much time left. Let's make it yours. Everybody's got a longer life than me! The leaf blowers: is there anything more futile? Car alarms. Clap off. Clap on. Spam. Size matters. No, it doesn't! Yes, it does! No, it doesn't. Yes, it does! No, it doesn't! Yes, it does! No, it doesn't! No, it doesn't! Yes, it does! Yes, it does! My phone rings! Make millions in minutes! It's a computer! Lose inches in hours! Leave me the hell alone! Eat more! Spend less! The Colonel is breakdancing! Give me a break! Credit terms raised! I can't get behind any of that! I can't get behind so-called singers that can't carry a tune, get paid for talking; how easy is that? Well, maybe I could get behind that. Well, I can't! If you have to fix it with a computer: quantised, pitch-corrected, and overly inspected, then you can't do it, and I can't get behind that! I--can't--get behind--a fat a**! Yeah, Bill, can you turn around and do one more? Always can do one more. Let's hit it!