Wayne Kirkpatrick - Something Rotten!/Make an Omelette lyrics

[Nick (Spoken)] Alas, poor yolk, I know thee well There's something rotten There's something rotten [Nick & Troupe] You can smell it You can tell it's something rotten Now the kingdom is shot And it's all gone to pot Heaven help us there is something rott-en [Nick (Spoken)] My father newly dead and the funeral boiled eggs Now coldly furnished for the marriage table Methinks another chef might have whisked our desperate eggs together as one [Will (Spoken)] Pray, nephew, what dost thou mean? [Nick (Spoken)] Well, I'll tell you [Nick] The fruit of life can't always taste like sweet persimmons Sometimes it's hard to swallow I'm afraid But when life has handed you some lemons Then hand it back a mug of lemonade My father said this to me That he did and then he blew me Away with wisdom simple and concise He said, "Eggbert, life is merely what you make of it So heed this sound advice" You make wine from sour grapes You got a flat pancake, hey, call it a crepe When life gives you eggs, make an omelette You get cola from a nut A dirty worm makes silk from out of his bu*t When life gives you eggs, make an omelette Omelette [Nick & 3 Troupe Members] The solution to your troubles is Cheese and vegetables And making bacon omelette, yeah! [Nick] When it looks like you should quit Find another way of looking at it [Nick & 3 Troupe Members] When life gives you eggs [3 Troupe Members] You gotta make that om-om-om Om-om-om Om-om-om Omelette Om-om-om Om-om-om Om-om-om Omelette Omelette! [Nick (Spoken)] Father! [Nostradamus] The solution to your troubles Right here in River City Shipoopi, Chicago Omelette, yeah! When it looks like you should quit [Nostradamus & Troupe] Find another way of looking at it When life gives you eggs Just a great big bowl of eggs When life gives you eggs You gotta make that omelette [Nick & 3 Troupe Members] Crack, splat, psss Crack, splat, psss Make an omelette Crack, splat, psss Make an omelette [3 Troupe Members] Make an omelette Make an omelette Make an omelette now [Nick (Spoken)] How? [3 Troupe Members] First melt a tablespoon of bu*ter in a medium frying pan Over medium heat And sauté the onions and green pepper 'til they're tender Add the ham pieces [Nick] Make an omelette Make an omelette Make an omelette now [3 Troupe Members] Turn off the heat Let the omelette sit one minute in the sk**et So the inside cooks right through [Nick] Take that egg and beat it Take that egg and beat it You gotta heat it and beat it, before you eat it So beat that egg Beat that egg Beat that egg [Nick & 3 Troupe Members] And that's how you make an omelette That's how you make an omelette That's how you make an omelette That's how you make it [Woman] And I am telling you I'm not gonna be an omelette Oh no, no, no [Nick (Spoken)] We really beat that omelette [All] You make wine from sour grapes You got a flat pancake, just call it a crepe When life gives you eggs, make an oh-oh-oh-omelette Take an egg and slap[?] on by If your cholesterol's high, you'll probably die When life gives you eggs Just a great big bowl of eggs When life gives you eggs You gotta make that om-om-om Om-om-om Om-om-om Om-om-om For heaven's sakes! It was white and yellow And white and yellow And white and yellow And white Make an omelette!