Various Artists - I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General lyrics

I am the very model of a modern Major-General I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotepotenuse I'm very good at integral and differential calculus I know the scientific names of beings animalculous In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral I am the very model of a modern Major-General In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral He is the very model of a modern Major-General I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinapinafore Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform And tell you ev'ry detail of Caractacus's uniform In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral I am the very model of a modern Major-General In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral He is the very model of a modern Major-General In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin" When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat" When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy You'll say a better Major-General had never sat a gee You'll say a better Major-General had never sat a gee You'll say a better Major-General had never sat a gee You'll say a better Major-General had never sat a sat a gee For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral I am the very model of a modern Major-General But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral He is the very model of a modern Major-General