Tom Wilson - Motorpsycho Nightmare lyrics

[Verse 1] I pounded on a farmhouse Looking for a place to stay I was mighty, mighty tired I had come a long, long way I said, “Hey, hey, in there Is there anybody home?” I was standing on the steps Feeling most alone Well, out comes a farmer He must have thought that I was nuts He immediately looked at me And stuck a gun into my guts [Verse 2] I fell down To my bended knees Saying, “I dig farmers Don't shoot me, please!” He co*ked his rifle And began to shout “You're that traveling salesman That I have heard about” I said, “No! No! No! I'm a doctor and it's true I'm a clean-cut kid And I been to college, too” [Verse 3] Then in comes his daughter Whose name was Rita She looked like she stepped out of La Dolce Vita I immediately tried to cool it With her dad And told him what a Nice, pretty farm he had He said, “What do doctors Know about farms, pray tell?” I said, “I was born At the bottom of a wishing well” [Verse 4] Well, by the dirt beneath my nails I guess he knew I wouldn't lie “I guess you're tired” He said, kind of sly I said, “Yes, ten thousand miles Today I drove” He said, “I got a bed for you Underneath the stove Just one condition And you go to sleep right now That you don't touch my daughter And in the morning, milk the cow” [Verse 5] I was sleeping like a rat When I heard something jerkin' There stood Rita Looking just like Tony Perkins She said, “Would you like to take a shower? I'll show you up to the door” I said, “Oh, no! no! I've been through this movie before” I knew I had to split But I didn't know how When she said “Would you like to take that shower, now?” [Verse 6] Well, I couldn't leave Unless the old man chased me out Because I'd already promised That I'd milk his cows I had to say something To strike him very weird So I yelled out “I like Fidel Castro and his beard” Rita looked offended But she got out of the way As he came charging down the stairs Saying, “What's that I heard you say?” [Verse 7] I said, “I like Fidel Castro I think you heard me right” And ducked as he swung At me with all his might Rita mumbled something About her mother on the hill As his fist hit the icebox He said he's going to k** me If I don't get out the door In two seconds flat “You unpatriotic Rotten doctor Commie rat” [Verse 8] Well, he threw a Reader's Digest At my head and I did run I did a somersault As I seen him get his gun And crashed through the window At a hundred miles an hour And landed fully blast In his garden flowers Rita said, “Come back!” As he started to load The sun was coming up And I was running down the road [Verse 9] Well, I don't figure I'll be back There for a spell Even though Rita moved away And got a job in a motel He still waits for me Constant, on the sly He wants to turn me in To the F.B.I Me, I romp and stomp Thankful as I romp Without freedom of speech I might be in the swamp