The Convicts - 1900-Dial-A-Crook lyrics

[Big Mike] Find a car in a cool-a** area Where you can walk by and motherf**ers won't be scared of ya Because if they're scared of ya They might get suspicious And call the police So you really gotsta listen A school or mall would be the best place to hit You gotsta be quick, and don't try no funny sh** Find a side window by the backseat of the car Bust it out and unlock the back door Jump into the backseat then you climb into the front You get the sh** smooth, but the job ain't done Thinkin' to yourself - "This time I got 'em" You stick your screwdriver in the steering wheel column Time to get busy, ain't no time to wait Pull on the screwdriver 'til the steering column breaks Then you take your hand and feel around for the pin And when you find it, put the screwdriver in Pull the pin back until the car starts Nothin' else to do but take the steerin' apart Then you drive off like it's yours, real slick Leavin' some stoopid motherf**er cold sick Dope-a** jack-move, straight out the book Exclusively on Dial-A-Crook [3-2] Get a test tube, some baking soda and a stove that's hot With your dope in any old kinda f**in' pot Put some dope in the test tube, not that much Add a little water, then baking soda - just a touch Place the test tube over the stove and start shakin' it Couple of minutes to the cut - you'll be takin' it But first look at it, it starts to form an egg-shape Put some mo' water in though, and carefully shake Then you hear it start hittin' the gla** Haha - a cookie on they funky b**h-a** But this ain't time for cappin' or frontin' Getcha f**in' razorblade and commence to cuttin' Cut up 20's, dimes and nickels, even save your crumbs Cause the sh** is so potent you'll have they whole f**in' body numb Then start kickin' out dope like karate But don't be a stupid motherf**er sellin' to anybody Cause the jump-out boys jump out fast How the f** you gonna run when the gauge is pointed at yo' a**? But f** all this information I'm givin', I ain't a book Put the phone on the hook Outta here, you dialed a crook [Scarface] Here's a game for you dick-s**in' b**hes Yo hoes, who's givin' up the p**y for the riches? But a n***a like me won't pay sh** To put it blunt to ya: "Homie don't play, b**h" So open up and lemme get it Me pay for the p**y? b**h, quit it Ain't no p**y in the world worth cashflow Put bank in your a**? Oh, no It ain't no way, motherf**er You could be the world's best dicks**er But you still don't fit for the payroll I run game on a b**h and lay low And let her roll with someone else And let the other motherf**er play his-self Let her get his cashflow But guess what, I'm still gettin' that a**, bro Let the other n***a keep her But everytime you f** her ain't that p**y gettin' deeper? I bet it kinda makes you wonder When you're home all alone, yo, Akshun plays the plumber Hahaha, you thought you had her But when you fall asleep, yo she's rollin' with the Bradster I peep out game and just chill You gave her money for her rent But honey paid my light bill It ain't like a n***a ain't rich It's just the b**h has gotta pay for this dick Reverse the game, get a hook Dial a Crook [Willie D] You wanna know how to put Hussein in the morgue? Well I'm the man for the motherf**in' job His phone could be tapped But I don't give a f** about that Lemme tell you how to get his a** OK, plan A - artillery You want somethin' that'll take a motherf**er outta his misery You can't use a scope like the old days Cause the motherf**er hidin' in them caves He ain't sh** to get with Just jump in a B-52 and make the hit For the army, navy, air force and marines Blow his funky a** to smithereens (Bushwick, can I get a witness? f** yeah, Nyquil that sickness) [Bushwick Bill] Size ain't sh**, load ya clip You wanna k** Hussein, I'm hip Let him get off in the water Screw on the silencer - now slaughter But don't aim for the back or the chest You know the motherf**er wears a bullet-proof vest Go after the head When you see red, the motherf**er's good as dead *BANG* That's all she wrote