Team StarKid - No One Remembers Achmed lyrics

Soldiers: (Alternating) In your homeland you're a legend All the people know your name On the battlefield and off you are superior Achmed: (Spoken) I know. In the kingdom though I'm finding that my only claim to fame is an incident involving my posterior Soldiers: Posterior Achmed: (Spoken) Please. I've won scores of bloody wars And mopped the floors with my foes But no one remembers Achmed I've eviscerated peasants From their heads down to their toes But no one remembers Achmed Say my name in these parts And you'll get a vacant stare Until you mention tigers Or spotted underwear Soldiers: Spotted underwear Achmed: So to restore my repute As a fierce fearsome brute, There's only one route I see Arrange the slaughter of millions Of innocent civilians Then they'll remember me (Dialogue) Soldiers: (Alternating) (Achmed:) Caked in mud or drenched in blood You smell as fresh as a flower ((Spoken) I know.) But no one remembers Achmed You can pleasure sixty concubines In only an hour ((Spoken) Less!) But no one remembers Achmed Achmed: Back home I was a hero Ladies trembled when I spoke But here the women treat me Like a throwaway joke Soldiers: Throw him away Achmed: I'm a god on Earth but darnit Even deities incarnate Now and then can feel a little insecure Soldiers: Insecure Achmed: All I want is some affection This rejection's almost Too much to endure... Soldiers: To endure Look at all he must endure (Dialogue) Soldiers: You ooze s** when you flex Those impeccable pecs Achemd: But the princess rejects me still She may not love me yet But I'm willing to bet That once I k** all her people she will... Soldiers: Yes she will Yes she absolutely will Achmed: Let them laugh, that's just fine But the last laugh will be mine All: 'Cause they can't laugh when they're all dead I'll make them all regret The day they chose to forget Achmed: (Spoken) What's that name everyone? Soldiers: Tiger-f**er! Achmed: (Spoken) No! Like I said, what's that name? Soldiers: You're the co*k of the walk With abs as hard as a rock Nevermore will they mock you Achmed Soldier: He f**ed a tiger Achmed: (Spoken) I did not f** a tiger! Soldiers: They'll remember Achmed... They'll remember Achmed... They'll remember Achmed... Achmed: They'll remember me... Soldiers: Tiger f**er Tiger f**er Achmed is a tiger f**er! They'll remember Achmed The tiger f**ing man!