Stevie Taite - Nail Varnish Numpty lyrics

I wish I was clever at painting my nails But varnish just laughs in my face I try to paint flawlessly, but doomed to fail The lacquer won't stay in its place I start off determined that perfect they'll be The left hand come close to the mark I let them dry out so they'll stay all smudge free And then on the right, I'll embark This is where 'do it yourself' cannot work As ambidextrous I am not It looks like a three year old child's gone berserk So I end up removing the lot Even if polish keeps where it's meant With cuticles sitting unscathed I guarantee before an hour is spent Their surface looks dull and engraved! The science of make up has answered our prayers With the smudge and chip free makes about I 'll have to remortgage my house but who cares I'll flaunt my nails more when I'm out!