It's many, many years ago When I was twenty-three I was married to a widow Who was pretty as can be This widow had a grown-up daughter Who's hair was red My father fell in love with her And soon these two were wed This made dad my son-in-law And changed my very life My daughter was my mother 'Cause she was my father's wife To complicate the situation Though it brought me joy I soon became the father Of a bouncing baby boy This little baby then became A brother-in-law to Dad That made him my uncle Though it made me kinda sad Cause if he was my uncle Then he also was a brother To the widow's grown-up daughter Who of course was my step-mother My father's wife then had a son Who kept him on the run He became my grandchild Because he was my daughter's son My wife is now my mother's mother And that makes me blue Because although she is my wife She's my grandmother too And if my wife is my grandmother Then I'm her grandchild And every time I think of that It nearly drives me wild Now I have become The strangest case you ever saw As husband to my grandmother I am my own grandpa Well I'm my own grandpa I'm my own grandpa That may sound funny I know But it really is so I'm my own grandpa