Saïga - The Perfectionist lyrics

Ellery Sneed had one great need To do everything just right If things were not planned and all done by hand He would ready himself for a fight One afternoon while sitting alone He came to a great realization When it's his turn to die Will there be enough time for plenty of planned preparation With a few minutes thought his decision was clear A fate most perfectly neat Not a friend could remain to witness his d**h So a terminal wine he would treat The plan was to hold a very large feast Serving the wine at the end Joining the fun would be everyone He'd been calling his friend Invitations went out, all guests did arrive The meal looked a great success Deciding the time he brought out the wine Up stood a familiar guest Here's a toast to our gracious host Said Ell's friend Billingford Bluffer Never in my life will I taste but a bite Of a more perfectly planned out supper