I got a dog in this fight I got troops on the ground His name is old Spayed Kooley he's the meanest dog in town If you think I'm foolin' try bustin' in through the door He'll tear you a whole brand new one and you won't come back no more Spayed's a good dog he's really bad He's the best pal this poor boy ever had Now Spayed might get suspicious when first you chance to meet So if you come a callin' you better wipe your feet Empty out your pockets let him see your hands Be sure to talk good English so he can understand Spayed likes mariachis he loves to hear 'em croon I know he'lI be watchin' if the fiddles ain't in tune When you come 'round to our table you better play it sweet Or it's adios muchachos down on Olivera Street Spayed's a good dog he's really fine So if you want to be a friend of mine Pledge allegiance to our flag try to sing on key And you won't have no problem with my dog Spayed Kooley