Story We now return to "Celebrity Apprentehh" Donald Trump Impression Now Lil' Jon, why do you think your team lost? Lil' Jon WHO WHAT?!! Donald Trump Impression You're supposed to be this great rapper How'd you lose a rap battle with the deaf b**h? CBS News We interrupt your program for a special word from the President of America Obama Impression My fellow Americans I have, uh, some sh** to tell you I know one president getting some an*l from Michelle b**h, I got him Saw bin Laden out in Pakistan, and shot him in the dome And told him, there you go I got him, yo We solved a f**ing problem, Joe? Let's break out the Hennessy Everybody, smack a b**h around from here to Tennessee Now let us see which Dirka Dirka wants another round with me I thought I told you crackers, you don't wanna f** around with me Osama bin Laden Ay, bro, recognize me? I look like the Durrky selling you a Slurpee So much noise about me Everybody judge me No one ever loves me They say, that I'm dead They don't even know I work at liquor store They test my DNA Science Man 1 This says, "Kareem Abdul Jabbar" Science Man 2 Yeah, that's him! Osama Impression I drive a cab in New York I did Nine-Eleven I fight for Jihad al-Quaeda give me discount card Obama Impression b**h please, b-b-b**h please Get off your f**in' camel Get your f**in' sandals Taking, we're t-t-taking All your f**in' countries From you f**in' monkeys Osama Impression Bro, I'm from Africa, I, come from Baghdad, The, Jews took my cologne, I, smell like a dog News Man Impression Mr. President, who should we blow up next? Obama Impression Well, I know Prince William, He living like a king He don't do sh**, He just sit, and get sh** for free How the hell are you gonna let him pay his wedding, With the money he took from you Motherf**er, let him pay for it What a bunch of pale, cross-bred, yeah, they all FAIL One of them is dead, and the others should be all in jail Oh, Prince Charles, living large, but your mom in charge f** you, William, and tell the Queen to slob all on my knob! Queen Impression We're all living like kings Raping all the peasants Taking all their presents So much nice things We could have it all We take it from the poor Prince William Hee-hee Queen Impression They say we're inbred I gotta f** me cousin, take a look at London They mad, they want bread But they can eat me a** poop Prince William AHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAAA! Obama Impression b**h please, b-b-b**h please Take off the f**in' crown and Blow your f**in' man, b**h Hey Queen, H-H-Hey Queen Get off the f**in' horse and Make me a f**in' sandwich Osama Impression Bro, f** you William, And, f** your fat who*e b**h, you can s** my balls I, f** you by force Donald Trump Impression Hello my name is Donnie Trump I make a billion every time I take a dump I don't need to win the White House, I'll just buy it I bought the Taliban and told Osama that he's fired Now Imma smart guy, what the hell's this royal wedding? I bought the palace and I'll move in when I'm f**in' ready So when you see the Prince of England stare and point and say Ey, you got some free sh**, bozo! All Lawyer You got some free sh** Donald Trump Saying Got some free sh**, Free sh**, IT'S FREE sh*t! Donald Trump Impression b**h please, b-b-b**h please Get all your f**in' boys and Watch my f**in' show, yeah Taking, we're ta-a-aking All your f**in' oil Yeah b**h, O'Doyle rules! Osama Impression Bro, I'm from Africa, Don't f** with my bros My crew's from Mexico, I blow myself up Obama Impression My fellow Americans, Today Osama bin Laden was found at a 7-Eleven in Pakistan, Ohio I greeted him there myself, with a birthday card as I haven't seen him in over ten years I asked him to come to my daughter's birthday party He declined, so I shot him in the face....Myself! We can all rest a**ured that Michelle will be giving me a blow job tonight...with her mouth this time Obama Impression Am I really the first black man that has to convince people I k**ed somebody? Michelle, what's that smell?