(Rod Stewart / Gary Grainger) I'm tired of buying Penthouse and Oui and Hustler It's Friday night I'm all alone still a bachelor She said she'd call me when she'd finished work Haven't heard a word all day I may not be Warren Beatty or Mohammed Ali (Attractive female wanted) I ain't asking a great deal, just a female to move in with me (Attractive female wanted) I'll share all my records, toothbrush and car and color TV, honestly A single girl for my single bed is my remedy (Attractive female wanted) She doesn't have to be a movie star cover of a magazine She can work in a garage all day in the evening some canteen I'm tired of blind dates making silly mistakes It's embarra**ing (Attractive female wanted) I've had no complaints but obviously you've guessed no compliments (Attractive female wanted) Won't someone please answer my prayers before I'm old and grey (Attractive female wanted) I've been lonely too long all of my family think I'm gay She doesn't have to be a movie star cover of magazine She can work in a garage all day in the evening some canteen Attractive female wanted Active female wanted I may get drunk stink like a skunk but she'll look after me (Attractive female wanted) Put me to bed ease my aching head and made fuss of me You know what I gonna do Think I'll write a letter to Mr. Hugh Heffner confidentially Dear Sir A single girl for my single bed is my remedy