Rednarf - Fears lyrics

[Hook: Ill-Noize] I've... Come to far to give this up now & the world knows that I'm way too proud Standing with my back towards the crowd 'cause the voice inside is way too loud (×2) [Verse 1: Ill-Noize] I try to smoke it out like a rodent I need something a little more potent The doors closing, gotta slip through the crack But will I fit with this monkey on my back? Will I make it out just in time? Or end up sellin' my soul for a couple racks? I gotta get my mind on track, I'm goin' loco-motive, everything I do, I got good motives But will I go unnoticed? I'm not a ghost, just bent, not broken... Everything I love seems to fall apart Without even a warning, leaves me in the dark & I don't know where to start, over... I'm looking for some luck in a four leaf clover But it's hard to stay focused when I can't stay sober... (can't stay sober...) Back in my cold room sippin' on liquor Trying to forget, but my mind gets sicker Thought the weed would keep me from slippin' But there's no extended hand to catch me when I'm fallin'... Wake up in my bed, man I must be trippin' Might have to hold off, but the d** keep callin'... I can't keep stalling... f** it, I'm all in... I gotta give it all I f**in' got I gotta face my fears if ima make it to the top Can't be shy, I gotta spit with pride, gotta show 'em I got a real reason to be alive Survival of the fittest, this ain't a scrimmage & this is no longer just the beginning Who do you think you're kidding? Ima spit an image of me winning, haha King sh** [Hook] [Verse 2: Ill-Noize] I've fallen in & out of depression so many times in the last 3 years, it just doesn't make sense... I thought I had myself all figured out, but now my grip on reality, is leanin' on the fence Everything I love, just left me I wasn't even sad, just empty, numb But I have to face myself, I got nowhere to run... Goddammit, not another panic attack It's been over a year, thought I was done with that All the colors in me just fade to black & what if my homies think that my music's wack?! Don't got much left to live for Haven't felt this cold in years But I gotta move past the pain Stand up, wipe away these tears! Depression, Anxiety, OCD I can't let these conditions control me Can't let fear rule my life The Devil's on my shoulder But I won't abide! Thought all this pain had died But it came back worse than ever Brought me right back to square 1 But maybe those ties were meant to be severed Have to look at things as lessons learned I gave my heart away, came back bruised & burned Don't have much to live for... At least that's what the voices in my head say I could could end it all, step in front of this train Or I could take a step back, & work through the pain But for now, I just gotta get through the days...