Proclaimers - Over and Done With lyrics

This is the story of our first teacher Shetland made her jumpers And the devil made her features Threw up her bands when my mum said our names Embroidered all her stories with slanderous claims It's over and done with This is the story of losing my virginity I held my breath and the bed held a trinity People I'm making no claims to a mystery But sometimes it seems like My s** life's all history I'm not saying these events didn't Touch our lives in any way But, ah, they didn't make the impression That some people say This is the story of watching a man dying The subjects unpopular But I don't feel like lying When I think of it now I acted like a sinner I just washed my bands Then I went for my dinner.