Pink Guy - Nickelodeon Girls lyrics

[Intro] (Hello, Nickelodeon headquarters) Hi, sorry to disturb you this late in the night I have a serious inquiry directed toward Nickelodeon My question is WHAT THE fu*k ARE YOU DOING? You know y'all used to have some fire b**hes When I turn on the TV I'm trying to see my favorite b**hes Zoey101? Jennette McCurdy? Oh my God And now all you got is these preteens Bruh, I'm not a pedo I'm not trying to look at these little kids and get aroused Now I can't watch Nickelodeon with my dick in my hand anymore Now I'm f**ing upset This is some f**ing bullsh** [Verse] Dan Schneider Bring all my b**hes back I need all my b**hes, I need all my b**hes The new sh** you put out is wack Dan Schneider I'm just trying to get an erection But now that these kids looking 13 and under My penis will suffer Dan f**ing Schneider (Schneider) This ain't a f**ing game, b**h I wanna watch a sitcom With my hand on my dick I wanna see a titty (titty) Not f**ing kid sh** Return all the hot chicks Or you gon get it b**h ICarly, iCarly I don't care if you look like Michael Jackson As long as you giving me action And Freddy gon' film the reaction Sam gonna join in And s** me a fat one Nickelodeon girls Can't live without 'em (whew) Ariana Grande I know I drive a Hyundai I can put you in a coma Have brunch on a Sunday (fancy) My dick put you in a coffin All night screaming and tossing Victoria Justice I know you tryna touch this Lizzie McGuire is tight But I bet Zoey's tighter You can find me in her bed Digging through that vaginer Amanda Bynes, you a little bit crazy But you can still have my babies (whew) Go down like a dog with the rabies Y'all can't save me Uh, a little bit of weed, hard liquor for the ladies Got me feeling like a young Dan Schneider from the 80's With a Jewish law firm and an all black Mercedes She playing with the balls like Brady (ay) f** off with the sh**ty little kids with their stupid sh** I only wanna see the ones with a body fit And I don't want to be the one to be a little b**h about it But I'm just saying what everybody is thinking (hahahahaha) Where the titties at? Dan Schneider why you ruining your business? You realize I'd probably buy cable if you keep all the girls And the ratings all stable Cuz I ain't tryin to see a young baby in the cradle Cuz I'm not a pedophile I'm not trying to see that sh** (c'mon man) The girls I have s**ualized are all in their 20's and 30's (Disclaimer!) I'm not saying you should change all the b**hes But at least something after 10:30 (30!) Dan Schneider Bring all my b**hes back I need all my b**hes, I need all my b**hes I need all my b**hes back I love you Dan Schneider, just please bring them back