Five o' clock, Friday, I can hear the whistle blowin' Got a 6:30 barbecue, and all my boys are showin' up: Skeeter, Cooter, Billy Ray and Bobby Ray and Billy Bob We got a pig in the ground, but can't remember where we buried it So we load up the truck with all the bourbon we can carry And we k** another hour shootin' BBs at the neighbor's dog Somebody throws a punch and my buddies get to brawlin' But I can hear the honky-tonk 'n' señoritas callin' We pile into the pickup, do some donuts on the lawn You'll find us in the mornin' when the money's all gone We'll be covered in piss and stinkin' to the heavens Sleepin' in the dumpster out behind the 7-'leven Our underwear is lyin' in the middle of the road and I'm bleedin' from a head wound, swellin' in the scrotum Got the shakes, DTs, gonorrhea and the trots And a tattoo on my bu*tocks in the shape o' Don Knotts Everybody runs when we make it on the scene— Six guys, ten teeth and one brain between us 'bout 11:30, and we're feelin' kinda down 'cause we already been booted outta every bar in town So we hang out by the school and watch the cuties leave the junior prom Me and both the Billys wanna see some nekkid ladies But the Hooter Hut is closed, Double D's is overrated So we hit the Jiggly Wiggly, where the headliner is Bobby Ray's mom Things are goin' good 'til a stripper starts to holler After Skeeter started diggin' round for change for his dollar Stripper throws a punch, Skeeter's laid out on the floor We prob'ly oughta help him, but we're runnin' out the door We'll be covered in piss and stinkin' to the heavens Sleepin' in the dumpster out behind the 7-'leven Our underwear is lyin' in the middle of the road and I'm bleedin' from a head wound, swellin' in the scrotum Got a squirrel and a stop sign hangin' from my bumper And a feelin' like a roman candle burnin' in my dumper A more pathetic sight you ain't never ever seen— Six guys, ten teeth and one brain between us Four in the mornin', and they kicked us outta Denny's So we motor to the Mini-Mart and spend our last twenty On a Molly Hatchet tape, a stack o' Swa*k, and seven packs o' chaw Cooter's is in the swimmin' pool that he just drove the truck in Billy Bob is pa**ed out, Billy Ray is upchuckin' And I'm crappin' in the parking lot behind the VFW Hall Sheriff pulls up and we're headin' for the station But Cooter's dad's a judge, so we get off with probation If you wanna separate the girlies from the men We'll see you next Friday when we do it all again We'll be covered in piss and stinkin' to the heavens Sleepin' in the dumpster out behind the 7-'leven Our underwear is lyin' in the middle of the road and I'm bleedin' from a head wound, swellin' in the scrotum Got the clap, dry heaves, Montezuma's and the shivers Pukin' on my Tony Lamas, coughin' up my liver If you can bail Skeeter out, then you can join the team Six guys, ten teeth and one brain between us Don't need any manners, common sense or self-esteem Six guys, ten teeth and one brain between us All you need's an attitude, a pickup and a penis Six guys, ten teeth and one brain between us