Stamp collections Eggs frying Staph infections Paint drying These are just a few of the things more exciting than soccer Baby showers James Buchanan Eight straight hours of A Prairie Home Companion These are some other things more exciting than soccer They say that it's the world's most popular sport I'd get excited for it if I tried Ninety minutes for Cameroon and Norway To reach a 0-0 tie Kiss a lawyer Do my taxes Get a hundren Brazillian waxes These just a few of the things I would rather do than watch soccer I would rather listen to Yanni CDs While receiving a sigmoidoscopy Administered by my 8th grade gym teacher The one who always smelled like Aqua Velva and cheese Than to have to watch soccer