One morning I woke up Scratched my balls and eyes I looked into the mirror And got a big surprise I don't know who this person is But I've seen his face before A face I don't want to have to face I don't think I like me anymore When I run into old friends Their eyes seem to dart away I wish I could remember All the sh**ty things I say Then one day my best friend said Something I'd never heard before You've done so much for me and I love you But I don't like you anymore Someone lock the door I don't like me anymore Here comes media who*e I don't like me anymore I heard this story twice before I don't like me anymore But punk may be hardcore I don't like me anymore Was it something that I've done? Was it something that I've said? Was I having too much fun? Did I dropkick someone's head? I turn on the TV And I don't like what I see There's an old punk rocker acting like a jerk And that jerk looks a lot like me Someone lock the door I don't like me anymore Here comes media who*e I don't like me anymore I heard this story twice before I don't like me anymore But punk may be hardcore I don't like me anymore A catastrophe I'm certain Hit the lights and grab the curtain Organize a mob and rush the door Peel me off the floor I don't like me anymore A bullet I've been sold I don't like me anymore People say they love me Then ask for something more The never-ending story A filibustering bore A pompous dinosaur I don't like me anymore Why does being nice to people Feel like such a chore? I am not your climber Feel like anybody's who*e A sober fact I wish I could ignore I don't like me anymore