Ninja Brian - The Book of Nook lyrics

[Egoraptor] Oh, sh**, let's play Animal Crossing now Come on everybody I'll show you how Now listen real close, I'ma tell you the sitch Cause my name is Tom Nook and I run this b**h Congratulations, you bought a new home Oh, you can't afford it? I can give you a loan You can catch some bugs till the debt's been paid Cause you're the newest member of my slave trade That's right motherf**er, this sh** got real I rule this crossing with my balls of steel I also like to rule it with huge a** guns And Timmy and Tommy, my giant mongoloid sons Kapp'n the turtle's gonna be your new guide Who can show you where the people who have crossed me died So give me your bells and don't misbehave Or I'll get Mr. Resetti to f**ing dig you a grave [Danny Sexbang] Animal Crossing, Animal Crossing is not a place you wanna f** around Now you're in Nook's town Where crazy sh** goes down So sell seashells and make some bells and shut your f**ing mouth Animal Crossing, Animal Crossing, this is his land Now taste the back of his pimp hand His balls are bra** And he's the mayor of your f**ing a** [Egoraptor] Damn, that's right, s*uts You got one choice, bow down or get cut You better recognize the tanuki tycoon And my thug life gang of adorable goons My owl a**a**in with a little bow tie You don't matter to Blathers, he'll make your a** die He'll tell you 'bout insects, letters and numerals And he'll get K.K. to f**ing sing at your funeral Kicks sells shoes and he doesn't take sa** And my boots are beautiful when I stomp your a** Brewster serves you coffee and scones And stabs your neck if you don't pay my loan So sell some sh** to my alpacas down south And if you don't, I'll-pack-a my nuts in your mouth You want in this town, you better bring some bells Or I'll co*k the Glock and f**ing send you to hell [Outro] [Ego] Yeah! What, you don't like my prices? Then go somewhere else! Oh wait, you're trapped in my town, b**h! So go to that island, and catch some beetles, sell them to my alpacas Your nuts are on special!