Nice Peter & EpicLLOYD - Moses vs. Santa Claus lyrics

Santa Claus Sweet robes, Obi one too many days in the sun Stop preaching, homie, teach your flock to covet some fun I bring joy every year, man, I represent cheer You represent sandals and a scraggly beard I'm from the North Pole, that's why my rhymes are so cold I spit diamonds but I'm serving up some fresh coal You've been a naughty boy, you brought a plague of frogs You'd best arrest yourself; you broke your own law Or was there something in Rule Six I didn't understand? My list says, "k**ed Egyptian dude, buried him in sand" I read your book, you got a strict religion. No bacon but mandatory circumcision? I'm a jolly bowl a jelly, giving holiday presents But all the chosen people ever get for Christmas is jealous Moses: When I was high up on the mountain, God revealed the truths of the Earth But he never mentioned a fat-a** Papa Smurf It takes nine reindeers to haul your fat a** You took the Christ out of Christmas and just added more ma** You need to stop breakin' into houses and creepin' and peepin' On naughty kids while they sleepin' and keep your hands off my stocking Don't you "Ho ho" me, I'll split your a** in half like I did the Red Sea You ain't a saint, you a slaver, like a Pharaoh in the snow Stop with the unpaid labor and let my little people go Santa Claus (We ain't slaves, all that sand turned your brain to mush) I think you need to stop smoking all that burning bush (Yeah, we're magical workers, man, we hang with reindeers) (Yo, here's a GPS, who gets lost for forty years?) You're a glorified secretary, so write this down (Begat deez nutz) Santa Claus is coming to town Moses So much drama in the Israel B.C. It's kinda hard talking directly to the G-O-single-D Hand me my chisel, I got a new commandizzle for y'all Thou shalt not let your children sit on a grown man's lap at the mall I'll beat you ten times before the bread can rise, you dummy And walk of into the land of my milk and honies