Mystery Science Theater 3000 - (Let's Have) A Patrick Swayze Christmas lyrics

[Verse 1] [Tom] Open up your heart and let the Patrick Swayze Christmas in. [Crow] We'll gather at the Road House with our next of kin. [Joel] And Santa can be our regular Saturday night thing. [All] We'll decorate a barstool and gather round and sing. [Tom] Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas this year! [Crow] Or we'll tear your throat out and kick you in the ear... [Break] [Joel] Hold it, hold it a sec. Cambot, stop the music. (music stops) Uh, Crow, I don't know if I think this is an appropriate sentiment anymore for Christmas. [Crow] Hey, what? Like a good action sequence don't belong in Christmas? [Joel] Well, no, it's just that I've never heard of an action sequence in a Christmas carol before. [Crow] Well, then grab hold o' your socks, Joel Robinson, and read on! [Tom] Okay, pick it up from measure 20, Cambot....Lovely intro, though. Very tasteful. [Crow] Thank you. [Verse 2] [Tom] It's my way or the highway, this Christmas at my bar. [Crow] I'll have to smash your kneecaps if you ba*tards touch my car! [Joel] I got the word that Santa has been stealing from the till. [All] I think that that right jolly old elf had better make out his will! Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas, one and all. And this can be the haziest... This can be the laziest... This can be the Swayziest Christmas of them all!