Momus - New Flame, Same Old Story lyrics

I went with my new flame To the city zoo To watch the animals sh** and screw I said 'Look at the turtles f**ing like rabbits' She called me a perve So I squeezed her tit She slapped my face and said 'Take me home!' When I dropped her off She said 'Please don't phone!' She said not to call So I typed her a letter I can't speak for her But it made me feel better Hippos sh** on hippos They respect So when I sh** on you Take it like a hippo Apes pick at apes They admire So when I pick at you Baby I'm full of desire If you were a hippo Or an ape You'd be the perfect The perfect mate Instead you're a person A sore tit you're nursing Cos you just can't relate