Momus - The Laird Of Inversnecky lyrics

"I think I'd rather sleep with her with no clothes on than you in your best suit" I said to my dummy at the Winter Gardens, Rothesay, Isle of Bute While the manager, praying for rain, watched the £50 grey clouds Rolling in Knowing if it rained we'd get the crowds Knowing if it rained we'd get the crowds Born in Greenock, 'the Tall Drole' was known to all Worked in the mines and the mills but ended up in music hall Maidie played the accordion, she was 'the Small Doll' We could bring the hoose doon, nae bother at a'! It all seems like yesterday, though you weren't alive The Panopticon, the Trongate, Glasgow 1935 In the name of the wee man, here comes Funny Clive God, it made you glad to be alive It's the Laird of Inversnecky here, aye you ken me weil With ma cast of characters frae places that are nearly real Cold today! Aye! That's why we're by the seaside Everybody come To the Aberdeen Beach Pavilion Every single night is fun! I began as the panto tea boy, became the canny Scot Like a chimney sweep on a ladder to very top Synonymous for many with my famous character The Reverend I.M. Jolly, the morose minister The character comedians that you may see today Where'd they get their talent for remarkable mimicry? It's plain to see, it came from me, I saw them scribbling away They all laughed like crazy at my "hoity-toity ladies" "The flag at the castle is half mast high Let's all go down to Mackie's for a wee cup of tea" It's the Laird of Inversnecky here, back to make you greet The Portobello pierrots, they cannae compete At the Aberdeen Beach Pavilion, sixteen bloody years we've run And every single night of it's been fun! Every single bloody night's been fun!